I just finished reading an article at Inc.com: 10 Habits of Remarkably Charismatic People. I like reading these types of articles because they help me find new ways to be a little better, or they give me a little pat on the back when they suggests habits or behaviors I already do. Like most articles of this nature, the list wasn’t exactly earth-shattering. Here’s the abbreviated version:
- Listen more than you talk.
- Listen to everybody.
- Put distractions away.
- Give before you receive, and expect to receive nothing.
- Don’t act self-important.
- Realize that others are more important.
- Shine the spotlight on others.
- Choose your words. (Choose to be positive.)
- Don’t discuss the failings of others.
- Readily admit your failings.
What I like about this list is not that it illuminates a path to +1 charisma but that it reminds us to be good people. The article could have easily been titled “10 Tips For Being a Good Human” or “10 Ways to Make People Not Hate You At the Grocery Store.” (Seriously–apply these at the grocery store, people.) But you know what’s more fun? 10 Habits of Remarkably Uncharismatic People:
- Talk all the time. If it’s worth saying, you’re probably talking about it.
- Only listen to people from whom you have something to gain. Otherwise, what’s the point?
- Text and email come first. People in your presence won’t mistakenly assume you’re ignoring them.
- Give only when you receive, else you might receive nothing. That would be totally unfair.
- Act self-important. Walk the walk, baby.
- Realize that others are just jealous. Don’t let them steal what’s rightfully yours.
- Shine the spotlight on your own achievements. You’re amazing! Make sure everybody knows it.
- Complain. If nobody knows you’re unhappy, you’ll have to keep doing it.
- Readily admit the failings of others. You’ll look better by comparison.
- Don’t discuss your failings. (Maybe nobody noticed.)
Back to the point, the 5-second version of the article goes something like this: be a {humble, respectful, positive, gracious, transparent, good} person, and people will like you more. When you put it like that, it’s a pretty obvious message. Nonetheless, it would go a long way if everybody were to embrace this list and focus on being a little more charismatic in their everyday lives. More specifically, at the grocery store. And at restaurants.
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